I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
