She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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