Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
