Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
