I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
