I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
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