dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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