Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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