I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
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