What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
