Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
