Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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