There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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