I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Can you repeat that, but with context?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Randomize