i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
organizing the empties. That sober.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
