just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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