Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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