Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize