i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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