You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
