in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
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