Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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