But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize