The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
