i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
