if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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