About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize