I need help removing her.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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