im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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