I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
