But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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