Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(810): View more from Michigan

Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!

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(805): View more from California

why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??

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(507): View more from Minnesota

So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?

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(714): View more from California

Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I keeping finding meatballs in random places

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(941): View more from Florida

Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.

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(313): View more from Michigan

will a lunchtime blow job make it better?

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!

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