so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
