So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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