Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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