so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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