weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
