why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
so let's talk penis.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Randomize
