I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
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