i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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