So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
