I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I want her autograph on my taint
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
