Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
