I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Randomize
