don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
