going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
