I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize