u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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