he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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