I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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